Call me silly, many do, but I absolutely adore Spam. The wife and I go through 3 cans a week. Really. The most popular consumption method in our house is “Spambled” eggs.
Spambled Eggs
- 1/3 to 1/2 can of spam, cubed (1/4 to 3/8 inch cubes)
- 1/2 medium white onion, sliced or minced
- 4 medium or 2 jumbo eggs
- 1/2 tsp vinegar
- Salt and pepper
Lightly brown the Spam cubes in a medium saucepan over medium-high heat. Stir / toss every 30 seconds. Add the onions to the Spam and cook until translucent. Crack eggs into the pan and add the vinegar quickly. Stir eggs to incorporate everything into the mix. Cook until it’s done to your taste.
The vinegar keeps the scrambled egg “clumps” smaller, gives a creamier texture, and adds a nice tang to the eggs. I use rice vinegar, usually seasoned (has salt & sugar in it), but I’ve been using garlic rice vinegar lately. White, cider, and wine vinegar work just as well, it makes no difference at all. You can omit it entirely if it creeps you out but it won’t be the same…
Onions. I typically use white onions. I’ve used yellow, red, Walla Walla sweets, Hermiston sweets, And Maui sweets and they’re all wonderful, especially the WW’s.
Flamethrower Spam
- 1 Can of Spam, sliced
- 1 Coat hanger
- 1 Propane flamethrower
Pull the Spam loaf from the can intact. Stand upright. Slice into 6 slices. Use wire cutters to remove the hook and neck of hanger. Straighten hanger then fold in half. Put a few twists in it 6-8 inches from the pointy end and sightly spread end. Slide a slice onto hanger. Light flamethrower (it helps to have a friend run the flamethrower) and hold the Spam in the middle of the flame, turning and moving constantly. Cook until browned. Serve with your favorite side dish.
A medium flame works best until you perfect your technique. Knowmad the bunny runs the ‘thrower in this photo.
Mmmmm!
If you don’t have a flamethrower, a charcoal fire, camp fire, house fire, or burn barrel will do just fine. Here’s a link to an episode of my cooking show that shows the technique:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HORuS9gOtQw
Enjoy the Spam. Don’t be afraid of it. The ingredients are listed right on the can. Don’t believe the bullshit about ‘mystery meat’, lousy quality, or the rumor that it’s made from people. If it was good enough for grandpa, it’s good enough for you.
Foxfur Amused 
Spam is best paired with bourbon.
You have taught me much. When’s the next class?
You’d love Hawaii – they do things with Spam there that’s quite incredible! Me, well, back in the day, we got Spammed to death because it was one of the cheapest things to buy after chicken and, well, I learned not to like it. We actually keep a few cans of Spam around as emergency food in case we lose power, get snowed in, something like that… but my dislike for the stuff is such that I’d filet the cat before I opened a can of Spam!